This Place of Feeling

"This place of feeling sqeezed is a very important part in our lives where we can really learn something. The point where we are not able to take it or leave it, where we are caught between a rock or a hard place, caught with both the upliftedness of our ideas and the rawness of what is happening in front of our eyes-that is indeed a very fruitful place.

When we feel squeezed there's a tendency for the mind to become small. We feel like a victim, like a pathetic, hopeless case. At that moment of hassle or bewilderment or embarrassment, our minds become bigger.

Instead of taking what's actually occurred as a statement of personal weakness or someone else's power, instead of feeling stupid we could be there, feeling off guard, not knowing what to do, just hanging out there with the raw and tender energy of the moment. This is the place where we begin to learn.

We're so used to running from discomfort, and we're so predictable. If we don't like it, we strike out at someone or beat up on ourselves. We want to have security and certainty of some kind when we actually have no ground to stand on at all.

The next time there is no ground to stand on, don't consider it an obstacle. Consider it a remarkable stroke of luck. We have no ground to stand on, and at the same time it could soften us and inspire us. Finally, after all these years, we could finally grow up."

Pema Chondron

Commentary:
And so it is. I sit with all my thoughts. All my feelings. All my dreams. All my fears. All my needs. All my desires. All the bottomless ground and the empty, infinite space. All my blessings. All my gifts. All my struggles. Filled with Gratitude, knowing that right where I am today is right where I belong and what has occurred today is the perfect teaching at the perfect time. And for the first time in my life I consciously choose not to put something in my mouth, not to call someone to talk just to make noise and disperse the energy. Not to turn to the television or a book. But just sit and feel and Be with myself, for myself. Present. Not running away from or toward. Not grasping, but releasing. My will to the Great Mystery and the perfect order than I have learned always exists.