Neshume-le

Neshume-le: Hebrew for "Beloved Little Soul"

Who is this soul? This blessed little soul, in embryo, coming to our family? I anxiously await the unfolding of their story. What will their physical attributes be? Who's personality will they mirror? What lessons do they have to teach us? What lessons have they come here to learn? What Karma have they carried in, ready to work out in all that life offers?

Surely, they are already deeply loved...a still, calm lake of love abides in their soon to be home; parents who love each other and respect each other and are kind to each other.

I already love him/her. I find myself looking forward to just sitting and holding while Courtney takes a much needed nap or a shower.

This year will be full of precious gifts. Justin returning, a grandchild arriving, to name only two.

I will share, at this time of gifting, another piece I wrote, also to my children as stood wrapping what seemed like empty presents one Christmas Eve. There were so many things, REALLY important things I wanted them to have and to know.


If I Could Give You Anything

If I could give you anything it would be...
An assurance of how perfect you are RIGHT NOW
That everything you were meant to have, and be, and do is within you now
You don't have to go searching outside yourself
Or look to others to show you or tell you how.
You have come with all you need to have joy, and purpose, and success.
And my love for you is unchanging and ever-present.

I would give you a vision of who you really are
And why God sent you here
To this time and place
To this family and these friends
To the stuggles you came to face and embrace
As well as the gifts that make you so wonderful...so unique...so you...so loved

I would give you a reason to get out of bed every morning in joy.
And the ability to lay down at night recalling the miracles that crossed your path.
That you may be able to close your eyes in gratitude, and sleep in peace
With an absolute knowledge of the hand of Spirit in your life.

I would give you the gift of curiosity
And a desire to seek knowledge and find truth
So that when you find it you may be full.
And trust in yourself, your intelligence and your intuition
Refusing to change your path or defer your truth to the thoughts and opionions of others.

I would give you depth of spirit.
To look within to discover that place and space that exists inside you always
Where God and you unite
Where perfect peace, and perfect knowledge and perfect truth are one.
Then when all else feels lost...for it will
You can return there and find the peace, love and rest that can be found nowhere else.

I would give you the Humility to reach out for help when you need it.
The blessing of good friends to reach to;
Who remind you of the truth about yourself when you forget.
To escort you back home when you wander away from yourself....and us
Your good and true home.

I would give you the dignity to know that your life is a journey.
And the choices you make are but experiments in truth.
So that when you wish you would have chosen differently,
You can stand in pride and call it learning...not a mistake.
Then act from that wisdom when life asks you to choose again..for it will.

I would give you a mirror
In which you see only your beauty and splendor, both inside and out.
That through your reflection, others see only the best in themselves.

I would give you a candle to light your way
And a pocket full of faith to take one step at a time when it is too dark to see any further.

I would give you courage,
So you can cross each bridge before you
And trust that something better is waiting on the other side
Knowing that smooth and familiar are not what bring growth.
So even if you have to close your eyes, or be pulled kicking and screaming
That in the end you will do it....Just JUMP!

I would give you a surety that God is always there for you.
That there is nothing you could ever do, or think, or be that changes your value.
So that when circumstances feel hopeless,
When those who are supposed to love and support you fall short...for they will
You will know that one thing never changes
God is always there....and so am I

Even when you can't see us with your human eyes,
Or hear our voice in your ear
Stop
Be silent
Be still
And you will feel
Our arms around you
Our LOVE surround you

Your Mother on earth
And your Father in Heaven
God will give you all that you ever need
And YOU are his precious gift to ME!


Valerie 2003

Due to my lack of techno mojo I have been unable to figure out how to post the image of Courtney's first ultrasound...however, in the spirit of tenacity, I will post the link and you can try to pull up the image.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=60100222#/photo.php?pid=30437794&id=60100222&ref=nf