If I Could Give You Anything

I have been through several "Dark Night of the Soul" experiences in my awakening process. The first one was the darkest and most confusing in that it truly descended upon me without warning and for absolutely no logical reason. A close friend could see the change in me and asked me what was wrong. I told him I had no idea and that was the truth. Thankfully, it came and went within a week, but brought in it's wake a gift to me. I have had to other Dark Nights, and if I ever have another I will welcome it in with loving embrace as I now understand that it is merely a process which brings about a burst of fresh creativity and growth. Just the being in labor, giving birth to more aliveness.....

This first one came just after Christmas 2003. As the holiday approached, I was wrapping the gifts I had bought for my kids and thinking about how superficial they were and the fact that in a few weeks they would have trouble recalling what I had gotten them. In the depths of the darkness that came in the weeks following, I sat down with a pen and only one question in my mind. "If I could give my kids anything, what would I give them?"

That is as much conscious thought as I put into it, but as soon as my pen hit the paper, my hand frantically wrote the following piece, in answer to the question I posed. It was truly the words coming through me, not from me, as I never even had a thought, only allowed the pen to move on the paper.

I share it now, wishing it all to everyone. In hindsight, I also see it as what God was giving me, and what was possible to feel and know within myself is true about me, and all beings.

If I Could Give You Anything

If I could give you anything it would be...
An assurance of how perfect you are RIGHT NOW
That everything you were meant to have, and be, and do is within you now
You don't have to go searching outside yourself
Or look to others to show you or tell you how.
You have come with all you need to have joy, and purpose, and success.
And my love for you is unchanging and ever-present.

I would give you a vision of who you really are
And why God sent you here
To this time and place
To this family and these friends
To the stuggles you came to face and embrace
As well as the gifts that make you so wonderful...so unique...so you...so loved

I would give you a reason to get out of bed every morning in joy.
And the ability to lay down at night recalling the miracles that crossed your path.
That you may be able to close your eyes in gratitude, and sleep in peace
With an absolute knowledge of the hand of Spirit in your life.

I would give you the gift of curiosity
And a desire to seek knowledge and find truth
So that when you find it you may be full.
And trust in yourself, your intelligence and your intuition
Refusing to change your path or defer your truth to the thoughts and opionions of others.

I would give you depth of spirit.
To look within to discover that place and space that exists inside you always
Where God and you unite
Where perfect peace, and perfect knowledge and perfect truth are one.
Then when all else feels lost...for it will
You can return there and find the peace, love and rest that can be found nowhere else.

I would give you the Humility to reach out for help when you need it.
The blessing of good friends to reach to;
Who remind you of the truth about yourself when you forget.
To escort you back home when you wander away from yourself....and us
Your good and true home.

I would give you the dignity to know that your life is a journey.
And the choices you make are but experiments in truth.
So that when you wish you would have chosen differently,
You can stand in pride and call it learning...not a mistake.
Then act from that wisdom when life asks you to choose again..for it will.

I would give you a mirror
In which you see only your beauty and splendor, both inside and out.
That through your reflection, others see only the best in themselves.

I would give you a candle to light your way
And a pocket full of faith to take one step at a time when it is too dark to see any further.

I would give you courage,
So you can cross each bridge before you
And trust that something better is waiting on the other side
Knowing that smooth and familiar are not what bring growth.
So even if you have to close your eyes, or be pulled kicking and screaming
That in the end you will do it....Just JUMP!

I would give you a surety that God is always there for you.
That there is nothing you could ever do, or think, or be that changes your value.
So that when circumstances feel hopeless,
When those who are supposed to love and support you fall short...for they will
You will know that one thing never changes
God is always there....and so am I

Even when you can't see us with your human eyes,
Or hear our voice in your ear
Stop
Be silent
Be still
And you will feel
Our arms around you
Our LOVE surround you

Your Mother on earth
And your Father in Heaven
God will give you all that you ever need
And YOU are his precious gift to ME!



Commentary:

If I could only have one legacy in this incarnation, I would want it to be that others felt valued and accepted in my presence. I truly believe that a loving universe would not have allowed each human to come here without giving them all the strength, tenacity, support and talents to survive what would inevitably be asked of them.

And yet I see.....so many, content to live lives of quiet desperation, when so much glory and joy awaits them if only they would look INSIDE....